CAT TALES

If they’re not happy, nobody’s happy

Judy Conlin

I’ve been thinking of downsizing since this big house and acreage is quite a bit for a little old lady to care for. As I’ve chosen neighborhoods to have a house built or to buy one already built, I am always curious about the neighbors as I was hoping to have closer neighbors than I now have. In the process I have visited all kinds of neighborhoods. Many do not keep their property up. Some are far from the nearest neighbor just as I am here. Some are running some kind of business from their home so there are oodles of cars coming and going at all hours. Some seem perfect, but I simply can’t afford them, or they have steep stairs that I’m afraid I’ll tumble down. My poor realtor has driven me around for months and nothing is ever perfect. I finally found a cute little neighborhood that I liked. I decided to check the neighbors out. I went to the house adjacent to the lot I thought I might build on and the lady there made it clear that she did not want a neighbor, that the folks there did not like outsiders, and I would not be welcome. I met another neighbor who was cordial and nice. I decided I was not going to let one neighbor keep me from having my little dream house built there. A house was going to be built on that lot whether it was for me or someone else. I was ready to sign the contract, when matters at my house took a turn for the worse. My cats were acting up. They were throwing their litter all over the porch. They ran from me if I tried to pet them. They stayed away from me whenever possible. They would come into the kitchen to eat but if I made a move toward them, they would flee. I know I am a grown woman and should be able to live my own life without worrying about my cats’ feelings. The truth of the matter is, however, I love those rascals and when they’re not happy, nobody’s happy. I try to ignore them and plan for a darling new home, but their bad mood persists. There is nothing to do but call in the s0-called cat whisperer, my alter ego, Nurse Judy. It always feeds her ego when I must come to her for help and this is no exception. She gives me her superior smile. “Having a little trouble with your cats?” she asks. Sometimes I hate that woman, but I need her now and must work with her no matter how much it pains me. I try to minimize the problem by saying, “they seem just a little out of sorts and I thought perhaps you might have an idea why.” I don’t fool her. “You need me,” she says with a chuckle. “You really need me. What’s in it for me if I help you? “You could do something just to be nice,” I say, but she just chuckles louder. “Hey,” I say, “you live here too. When the cats aren’t happy nobody’s happy and this will affect you too sooner than later.” She knows what I’ve said is true, so she reluctantly takes the cats outside to consult with them. I look out of the window. Beebe is angrily pawing the ground and Momau is growling. Nurse Judy is laughing any more. She looks mad too. All three traipse into the house and sit down staring at me accusingly. “What’s up?” I try to sound perky and friendly. Two tails begin slapping the floor in unison. Nurse Judy is equally nasty. “It’s all your fault as usual.” She says, glaring at me. “What did I do?” I ask. You’re moving without any consideration for the cats.” “That’s not true,” I argue, “The builder is making the laundry door swing outward so there’s plenty of space for their feeding station. He’s screening the back porch so they can sit outside and watch what is going on. He’s putting in a special pet door for them. I have been looking out for them.” “Yes, but you decided to move in next to someone who doesn’t want you there. If she doesn’t want you, she’ll hate 2 cats even more. They won’t know where her lawn starts and your tiny lot ends. She may chase them or yell at them and scare them. They’ve had acres to play in and not bother anyone. You have only thought of yourself.” I listen. It’s all true. They would not be happy there and thus I would not be happy there. “We’re not moving there,” I say. Two loving cats jump on my lap and start licking my face. All would be harmonious except for Nurse Judy’s self-satisfied smirk. You can’t have everything, I guess.

More later,

Judy and the cats www.nursejudyinfo.com

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