CAT TALES Cat chauffeur

Whenever the cats have a veterinary appointment, they know what is going to happen before it does. Days ahead of time, I get out the cat carrier and lay it flat with the flap open. Beebe has a premier carrier which is blue and embroidered with pink flowers. He knows it belongs to him and will crawl in it and nap from time to time. Momau has a plain old plastic carrier which takes up too much room to have in the house ahead of time.
Despite Beebe’s apparent affection for his jazzy cat carrier, when the day arrives for the appointment, Beebe is nowhere to be found. When he gets hungry enough to come out of hiding, he will not go near the carrier. Momau has no idea what is going on, but she senses Beebe’s fear and hides under a chair ruffle.
It takes a lot of maneuvering to get Beebe packed up. I first tip the carrier on end with the open end up. I begin chasing Beebe, who despite his girth is quite quick. If I manage to latch on to him, he squirms out of my arms lickety split and the race is on again. Eventually I will prevail and try to stuff him in the top of his carrier, He pops back out like a jack in the box on a spring.
In the meantime, Momau is peeking out from his ruffle wide-eyed. What is that monster doing to her brother?  She shrinks back further and further.
I finally get Beebe zipped up but he soon has the whole carrier rolling around, I ignore that and go fetch the plastic playhouse type carrier for Momau. Since she is younger and slimmer (although she, too, is beginning to look chubby) you would think she’d be even harder to get caged. The truth is, Momau is a true scaredy cat. She lays down trembling making me feel like the monster she believes I am. I can easily maneuver her into her riding crate .She begins wailing. Beebe joins in .Once both are finally ready, I must carry the two wailing squirming  bundles of feline joy to my vehicle. My bad knees protest, and it is 2  long jerky agonizing  trip, but I make it.  I get 2 oversized bath towels and cover their cages. This minimizes the crying,
As I drive to the office, the kitty nearest to me begins sticking his paws through the bars  and jabbing his claws into my leg. I cry out but valiantly carry on. This is an average day chauffeuring the cats to the vet.
What is peculiar about the whole thing is the difference between taking Beebe to the veterinarian and just taking him for a ride. Let me explain. Since he was small, Beebe has run down the driveway to meet me whenever I drive home from an outing. I open the door and Beebe hops in and rides up the driveway with me, purring the whole way. This has been going on for years .He shows no of the hostility he exhibits on a vet trip. This is an easy enjoyable chauffeur job.
Yesterday he added a new twist to our driver/passenger relationship. I had an appointment and drove down the driveway, stopping at the bottom of the hill to put mail in the mailbox. I left the car door open. When I returned, Beebe was sitting in the driver’s seat. He had run down the driveway and hopped in. I laughed and tried to pull him out. He jumped into the back seat. I opened that door, and he jumped back into the front seat. He refused to leave, and I was going to be late for my appointment. I finally shut my door, drove to a neighbor’s house, turned around and drove him back up our driveway. I opened the door, and he strolled out as pleased as punch. He had gotten his ride and was now content. All was right with his world.
Being a cat chauffeur can be a fun occupation, but do not take it up unless you have nerves of steel, the patience of a saint, and don’t need to get anywhere on time.